“I don’t want to cover up anymore. Not my face, not my mind, not my soul, not my thoughts, not my dreams, not my struggles, not my emotional growth. Nothing.” – Alicia Keys
I read an article about Alicia Keys and how she went to a red carpet event without makeup. Apparently there are people who feel affronted that she would go bare-faced to a fancy event but I think it’s awe-inspiring that Alicia Keys would do that. The reason why I bring up this article and shared the quote by Alicia Keys is because I want to talk about my makeup timeline. I already shared a bit of it in my 10 Facts About Me blog post but I want to share more of it and just say where I’m at with makeup right now.
So, recap: My mom always put makeup on my sisters and me when we were younger for family pictures and just for fun. It got to the point where I would raid her makeup drawers. This, however, ended when I was around eight. I went five or six years without any interest for makeup and a strong distaste toward it just because my mom loved putting it on her little girls. It became too much for me then. And then, I was sixteen and playing with makeup again, raiding my mother’s makeup drawers and sneaking it into the bathroom where I’d play with makeup for an hour. Put it on. Take it off. Do something new. Repeat.
Come college, my mom packed me a bag of makeup and made me take it to my dorm. I did my regular spiel about how I hate makeup but it was almost as if she knew I’d been playing with makeup for the past two years. I put up a weak fight and accepted the basic makeup assortment she gave me: a couple colored eyeliners, black, white, and brown included, mascara, two lip-liners, a couple lipsticks, chap-stick, an eyelash curler, two mini eyeshadow palettes (one of purples and another of nudes), and a brow pencil. Very minimal. Very basic for beginners.
During my first year in college I spent every morning doing my eye makeup. It was really easy. All I did was put eyeliner and a soft wing or no wing and mascara. It made me feel more awake and look awake. My eyes got a little bigger and rounder than usual. I mastered doing the eyeliner flick. If I wasn’t wearing my glasses, I’d put on a brown eyeshadow for depth. During fancy events I would do the same morning makeup routine plus doing my eyebrows and putting on lipstick. I was still new to it. I didn’t know anything about foundation, bronzer, contouring. I just watched the Youtubers do it. I remember, around the middle of my first semester there, I looked myself in the mirror and was astonished. My eyes looked pretty without makeup. But the eyeliner was already in my hand and I put the makeup on without another thought. It had become routine for me.
In my second year of college I did my regular makeup morning routine whenever I wasn’t lazy. I didn’t add to it. In my third year I was introduced to contouring. I only did that for days when I had a lot of time. Otherwise it was the usual makeup routine plus BB cream, brown eyeshadow, and white eyeshadow for the inner corner of my eyes. In my fourth year, it was the same routine but I was more confident with contouring.
Now, it’s been almost a year since I’ve been an undergraduate. I went makeup-less when I graduated. I only put makeup on when there’s an event going on or when I know I have time. I like to be meticulous about my makeup now. I like to put foundation primer, foundation, eyelid primer, and so on and so forth and put it on my face. Yet… Every time I look at my face I realize some things:
- I’m no good with makeup. My blending is bad, the colors don’t match, my contouring is okay, and my lipstick goes awry one way or another.
- I prefer simple natural-looking makeup looks. I don’t like bold eye colors but I’d always love to try it.
- I always get really upset with myself when I’ve finished putting on makeup because I’m never satisfied.
This, honestly, made me appreciate my plain face. However, now that I’ve realized that I don’t have a knack for makeup, I only do my eyebrows and fill them in, put on BB cream, put on eyeliner and a coat of mascara, and I’m done. However, some days, I just want to go makeup-less. I agree with Alicia Keys. Going out with no makeup lets you go bare. As Alicia Keys said, you can be bare for anything. For me, I still need the confidence to be bold and bare.